Brown Bag #2

Brown Bag #2
Hey folks! So here I am again… sitting in front of my computer with a cup of coffee; in the middle of the night. Why the middle of the night, you ask? It’s because I am an insomniac. Plus, this is the only time of day where my brain finally calms down long enough to get a few coherent thoughts out. It’s only Friday (well, Saturday, now I guess since it’s the middle of the night) and I’ve decided to write this in advance for three reasons. 1) it’s been on my heart and I want to share. 2) If I don’t get the thoughts out on paper, not only will I not be able to sleep, but they’ll leave my brain too. That would be sad times because it’s not often I have insightful things floating up there in my noodle. And 3) because I really hate sitting still but I just painted my toenails and I’m waiting for the nail polish to dry so I don’t mess it up. But that’s the least important reason.

So you know how when you’re lifting weights they tell you “if it hurts you’re doing it wrong”? … AIM is the opposite. If it hurts, you’re doing it RIGHT. Ministry is about vulnerability. Now, vulnerability is neither something I enjoy, nor, am very good at. Being vulnerable means opening yourself up and leaving the possibility open for someone to hurt you. I didn’t fully understand this concept until I started AIM. Before AIM, I was in college full time and working a full time job. I was a strong, independent girl and didn’t need anyone. Boy was I wrong. Right as I was moving to Lubbock my mom told me that she had a mammogram done and they found something on it that they wanted to biopsy. I was terrified, but didn’t tell any of my classmates right away because I didn’t want people to view me as “weak”. Finally, one night during the first or second week, we were having a prayer devotional in my best friend, and now teammate, Charlie’s apartment. I told my classmates that I was scared for my mom and I completely fell apart. It was both terrifying and liberating. Then, I remember sitting in Pat’s class… unable to fight back tears because I was so scared. I just cried and cried… and Pat was real with me. He let me cry and he cried with me… and I had no choice but to lean on my classmates. That was the first step of vulnerability. I was doing some personal study in Philippians and I wanted God to guide me during my AIM time. While reading Philippians chapter 2, I came across verses 5-7. I love the way my translation reads. It says “make your own attitude that of Christ Jesus, who, existing in the form of God, did not consider equality with God as something to be used for His own advantage. Instead He emptied Himself by assuming the form of a slave…” He EMPTIED himself. That means Jesus gave everything He had until there was nothing left. AND he assumed the form of a slave… he SERVED people. That means He was vulnerable and let people hurt Him. The most obvious examples I can think of are Judas or Peter. Jesus is the Son of God. He TOTALLY knew that Judas was going to betray Him, and He knew Peter would deny Him. Yet, He still let them close. He allowed them to hurt Him. He emptied Himself. If the Son of Man could empty Himself to the point of death, then I can be real and open myself up to people. Battle wounds are ok. Scars heal, and soon that excruciating battle wound is just a dull memory. So, dear AIMers, with heart planted firmly on sleeve, I bid you adieu. I’m praying for you daily, and am so thankful that you’ve made the decision to devote your life to Christ! You won’t regret it- I promise! Until next week, friends.
AIMing to be like Jesus
Sarah Beth